Introduction #1

I normally use my instagram for things like this, i always loved the idea of blogging but was too lazy to ever do anything lmao. My name is immy, i am 15, non-binary and i am attracted to girls. In simpler terms, i use they/them pronouns and think girls are nicer to date than boys.

I’ve had a pretty normal upbringing, no divorce, lot of arguments, moving house every couple of years, losing grandparents etc. I first realised something was wrong with me when i was 13. My head started feeling heavy and I hated big crowds and being around people. It was simpler then, i’d hold tighter onto my dad’s arm and wait for the feeling to go away, i’d talk to my friends and was told it was normal and it kept being normal till panic attacks became too frequent. I was diagnosed with anxiety and given an online service to look at. My parents left it at that. A couple months later, everything would come crashing down once again.

Meet the parents, lets call them Sarah and Dean. Sarah, religious from birth, baptised at 14. Dean, religious from 23, baptised at 24. Married, had a daughter, another daughter and a son. The eldest daughter, Matilda, baptised at 17 and lastly, four year old Ryan, who has no idea whats going on.

I am the problem child, the middle child, the child who told their parents they didn’t want religion, not only that, but they were also gay.

I was struggling mentally, i’d been struggling ever since i left that doctors room at age 13. I knew it was more than anxiety, sitting in your room, numb, wishing you were dead and ripping your skin apart for a bit of relief was more than anxiety. So, after getting the courage to tell my parents I was LGBT, I managed to sob out all the things i’d been doing to myself.

Since then, (1 year, 6 months), I have been diagnosed with depression, disordered eating and have been in therapy. Currently about to go in for more. It’s a lot.

So that’s the deep part out the way, hi. I enjoy making playlists, playing ukulele, brooklyn nine nine and being with friends. I’d say my music taste is (gross i’m sorry) indie, i guess. I’m self taught on ukulele and b99 is my comfort show. I have irls and my internet friends and they’re all great.

Right now i’m okay, i hope you are too.